Sunday, February 2, 2014

“To Walter” (the Policeman)


Patrol was painful tonight.
I could barely speak of it to my wife.

I needed her arms---to banish the demons
to vanish the visions before…become dreams.

He was in the thick of the busy street.
Staggering, singing at the top of his lungs
savoring, bellowing, his own “saucy” sound.
in the husky voice of a practiced lush.

People turned around and stopped,
riveted viewing the raucous display.
           
            I tried to take him peacefully,
                                    cautiously,
                                    quietly
                                    no need to make a mess of things.
            I tried to take him without force,
                                    without brutality
                                    but WHAM
                                     he struck me and ran,
                                    bruising more than my pride
                                    making spectacle all the more a marvel
                                    selfish riot to behold.
           
            My partner got him from behind,
                        grabbed him tight by neck and shoulder
                        took him roughly to the ground.
           
He was still singing---
                                                and the crowd still laughing.
                                                …I didn’t laugh.
           
I thought of his wife, who would wait in vain.
            and thought of other drunks in town.
                                                with ice upon my swollen eye.

            I thought of all the other sots
                                                of pubs and bars
                                                football games
                                                and office parties.                                                       
           

I thought of them…    coming home tonight.
                                    jumpstart the cycle
                                    of frightened young children
                                    fake explanations for empty wallets
                                   
                                    screaming
                                    crying
                                    hitting
                                    fighting
                                    and children conceived
                                                of drunken embraces.

It wounds me
---all of it. . . .
but I can’t just forget.

The laughter that struck me,
that grotesque clown in the midst of the street
                                    he doesn't stop singing
                                    (his humiliated wife)
                                    he doesn't stop laughing
                                    (his kids scared to cry.)

                                                                                   

Jesus Christ.



I need my wife.
I need to lie tired and still with her beside me.
I need her in silence to understand
                                    and give her assent with arm around me.
                                    .

I need my wife.



Patrol was painful tonight.

No comments:

Post a Comment